


(Don't) Leave Me Alone

by iktwabrokenbone (apiculteur)



Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Angst, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-23
Updated: 2014-12-23
Packaged: 2018-03-03 01:36:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2833355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apiculteur/pseuds/iktwabrokenbone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tyler left without saying goodbye. (Life moves on.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	(Don't) Leave Me Alone

**Author's Note:**

> for anon's prompt:  
> Imagine person A of your OTP leaves person B without saying goodbye, just leaves a note saying they got a job far away and that saying goodbye would be two painful. Person b still calls them multiple times, but there’s never a response. A few years later (after B has moved on), B gets home from work and sees A in their house. What happens next is up to you. (Tyler/josh) pls
> 
> i kinda got confused about whether josh was supposed to be in a relationship when tyler came back
> 
> title from kitchen sink

Josh woke up, arms empty and alone in his bed. For the past few days, it had been the same. Tyler had started sleeping in the same bed as him, but his bad sleeping habits meant he woke up way before Josh and never slept as long as he should have.

Josh yawned, reluctant to get out of bed and face their cold apartment. It was kind of crap, as it was the only place they could afford, but he loved it. He would probably love it more if the heating worked properly, but the fact that he had bought this with _Tyler_ from his terrible Guitar Centre wages and Tyler's almost equally low pay from working a phone line.

At some point, their relationship had evolved from flat mate to best friends, then to best friends with benefits. If Josh had to take a wild guess, he would say they were dating now. Maybe he was being presumptuous- he had been on the receiving end of Tyler's 'you know that this is just sex, right?' rants enough times, Tyler was definitely trying to not be the sort to settle down- but Josh felt this was different. It had felt different this time, with Tyler smiling at him and digging his head into Josh's shoulder, kisses and gasped _I love you_ s.

Josh stretched out, and attempted to mentally prepare himself to venture out into the cold. At least Tyler would probably have made coffee for him. He pushed himself up and heard a crinkling sound.

Beneath his right hand, on Tyler's pillow, was a piece of paper. It had been ripped from a notebook, the one Tyler scribbled in sometimes, drafts of songs they planned to play on stage together one day. He picked it up and read it, bleary eyes ready to skim over some note about going to the shops, maybe with a kiss at the end.

His gaze sharpened when he actually registered the words.

_im so sorry josh. i got offered a better job somewhere far away- i don't want to tell you where- and im leaving. or im gone. i kept on backing out from telling you and i think it's better if i just leave like this. a clean break. you're better without me._

_im sorry._

_-tyler x_

Josh laughed awkwardly. "Tyler?" he called. A few seconds and a glance at his phone revealed that, no, it wasn't April first. "Ty, are you there?"

He pulled himself out of bed, cautious putting his feet on the ground. Tyler was probably under the bed, waiting to grab his legs and laugh when he screamed. Pranks weren't really their thing, but they were here now, weren't they?

He dropped to his stomach, the rough carpet making his bare chest itch. It was empty darkness. The whole _house_ was empty darkness, one room with the light off after the other.

"Tyler, please come out," he said, too half-hearted to be classed as a shout or call.

He was out. Tyler was probably out.

To: Tyler  
 _where are you?_  
Sent: 10:32  
Read: 10:32

The message said it had been read, but there was no reply.

To: Tyler  
 _tyler please_  
Sent: 10:36  
Read: 10:37

Read. No reply.

To: Tyler  
 _ty?_  
Sent: 10:48  
Read: 10:52

To: Tyler  
 _i miss you_  
Sent: 11:14  
Message not read

***

 _Life moves on_. Josh repeated this to himself when he woke up the next morning, choking as he woke up from a nightmare. Tyler had left him with only a note and he had felt so /alone/, but Tyler was-

Tyler was gone. It was fine. He wasn't hurting.

He smiled when he got to his mediocre job- _i got offered a better job somewhere faraway_ \- and it barely wavered when Mark asked him how he and Tyler were doing. He got out the words, said they were fine and told his mind to shut up when it scoffed. The smile stayed plastered on his face until he got back home to more dark rooms and silence, more delivered but unread texts. At that point, he was crying.

***

He couldn't keep it hidden for too long. Other people had noticed Tyler's radio silence, then Josh's fake smiles, finally the empty house. He couldn't afford rent by himself, had to room up with some girl Mark was friends with.

She wasn't Tyler, but he felt less alone. He woke up from nightmares which ended up being real, and when they became friends she started knocking on his door and calming him down.

Debby held him when he cried over Tyler for only the second time, when he came gushing out with it and she told him that he must've been an asshole, that Josh deserved better. He cried more because she was wrong, because Tyler had been his everything, and he still was. Because Tyler was the sweetest guy Josh had ever met, but he just hated himself so much that he didn't understand that he could mean something to Josh.

But time moved on, and his life moved on, and Tyler stopped being a fresh wound, the scar he left healed over somewhat. It was deep, and when he and Debby became involved, he woke up to nightmares about her leaving, but she was there. She was there, she was real, and she was staying.

He texted Tyler about Debby, told him that he still loved Tyler as that would never change, but that Debby made him feel alive and happy and he didn't love Tyler any less but Debby meant more to him now. Because Debby was there and she didn't run away when he told her he loved her, and they were happy.

***

He and Debby moved into a bigger apartment, with the same number of bedrooms, but heating that worked and a decent sized fridge, a bathroom which didn't have loose tiles on the walls.

They were happy.

***

He and Debby broke up.

It hurt- it hurt _bad_ , because they lived together, and they still loved each other, they just weren't _in love_ anymore. Neither of them had wanted to do it, and they both cried. They cried and apologised and ate separately for months, tried as best they could to silently negotiate who slept in the spare room- now Josh's room- and did their best to avoid each other until the pain was less fresh, had time to heal and dull.

Josh was pretty sure at one point they both moved out to live with their friends for a while, Josh with Mark and Debby with Jenna.

It was lonely again for a while. He loved Mark, but he was closer to Debby. They had been best friends and lived together for close to three years, she had held his hand when he got tattooed, had watched him burn up in the aftermath of Tyler- it still hurt to think about him, loose ends and a scrawled note he still read and reread too often, the number still in his phone, full of sent texts that were never read or answered.

But he was healing, everyday. He was getting better and hurting less, and Debby was talking to him again, the smiles growing less tense, back to relaxed friends. Sure, sometimes poor phrasing set them back to being uncomfortable, long pauses where there should've been easy conversation, but for the most part they were fine. She was his best friend, after all.

***

Work was boring and lame. Customers were rude and pushy. He never wanted to work another day in his life. Couldn't he just get paid to eat Taco Bell and hug kittens? There was probably someone out there doing at least one of those things for money. He envied them.

"Hey Deb," he called, shrugging off his jacket. He could hear her talking sharply to someone, then shoes clicking against the hard flooring.

She looked up at him, teeth pulling at her lips. "Josh- I. We have a _guest_ ," she said, voice low and purposeful. "I don't know how you'll feel. I'll leave you two alone, but be careful. I'll be close if you need me."

With that, she squeezed his hand and walked off. "Yeah, sure," he muttered, watching her disappear into her bedroom.

She seemed to come from the sitting room, so he made his way towards there, absently fiddling with a loose thread on the hem of his shirt.

"Hey."

The nervous voice was familiar, and he stopped walking, nearly tripped over his own feet and felt his knees buckling. He hardly stopped himself from falling to his knees, almost wished he had. It was hard standing up. The voice made him light headed, flooded him with memories.

"Are you okay?" he asked, and Josh looked up, wondered how Tyler could ever ask him that question, could sit in that chair picking at his nails like Josh had seen him do so many times before, only in a different chair in a different apartment in a different time.

"No," Josh choked, collapsing into the nearest seat. "How could I be? You left me. You left me with a note. A goddamn _note_ written on paper, didn't give me any warning, didn't answer my texts."

Tyler said nothing. At least he knew a simple _I'm sorry_ wouldn't cut it.

"For about an hour I thought it was a prank." Tyler winced and didn't make eye contact. "I was lost. I was lost, then I found someone new but you still mattered to me, she just mattered more, and now I'm starting to think you still matter just as much, I just hate you at the same time. You mean so much to me, Ty. You can't just _leave_ me like that."

"I know," he said. "I know and I feel like- like _shit_ and that means nothing because I still hurt you. I didn't want to hurt you. I just- couldn't do that."

"You said you loved me then you left the next morning."

"I didn't think I was worth it. Worth _you_. I'm so- Josh, please. I," he paused and Josh shook his head. "I'm sorry, I love you."

"Those are the two things I didn't want to hear," he sighed. He wanted to return it, or maybe just cry or shout or pretend this never happened.

"I know. Debby told me a bit before you got back," he said. "Well, more shouted threats at me, but I got the idea."

Josh's lips twitched at that. "She's great. You'd get along with her well. After a while."

Tyler laughed, and they were chatting and Josh was hurt, but so was Tyler.

Debby came through after about an hour. She joined them, fitting in with their conversation easily. Josh was pretty sure he heard her whisper a threat in Tyler's ear, probably something along the lines of, "If you hurt him I'll kill you," and he nodded vigorously. He pretended not to notice.

Life moved on, past repeated itself, as Josh was going to be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> heyy any of u ship phan?? i [wrote a phanfic kinda thing](http://phantasticficrecs.tumblr.com/post/105817458017/im-not-the-one-you-know) about gender fluid!dan on my phan blog so i figured i should advertise that here.
> 
> prompts r [always open](http://iktwabrokenbone.tumblr.com/ask)


End file.
